This past week consisted of a mishmash of emotions. Mostly, it had to do with walking around with stitch, covered by a band-aid, on my right cheek, just below my eye. I have always joked with a friend that between the two of us, I, the girl with the fair skin, would be tested for skin cancer before the other, the tan girl who always came into work o nMondays with a fresh burn on her cheeks. Thankfully, it was benign (and something else completely different…and gross).
I was having a week. I was trying to keep my spirits up, tried to stay positive and all that. However, subconsciously, it was affecting me. I was not sleeping well. I sketched a few self-portraits of me, as a vampire, with a disease spreading across (you guessed it) my right cheek. I am pretty sure that was a good sign that something was eating (Oh how I pun) away at me mentally.
Enter another super funny post from The Bloggess that featured a selection of awkward moments in her and our lives. I have had plenty of my own, which made me laugh (internally, with a little suppressed snicker, even though there is no one else at home), and made me feel better. It also reminded me of moments in my past life (or at my last place of full time employment) when I enjoyed a daily encounter with people who bestowed me with the honor of catching them in their finest moments.
I feel it is time to share these with others. Let us call them Moments with Great Minds.
The Bird Crap on the Window: It was around Halloween time, and I made brownies for the office. With brownies in one hand and colored canned frosting in the other, I went to each of my coworkers office and gave them each a brownie. I walked in to the last office of a coworker, and I stand in the door while he is feverishly trying to wipe something off the window. He is scratching at it, using spit to soften it, you name it. I walk in to his office, stand in front of his desk.
Me: “It might be hard to get that off your windows, unless you go outside to remove the bird crap.”
Coworker: “I just realized that,” he says and he sits down at his desk.”
The fold here to fax: Our receptionist, young and…young, asked me to show her how to use the fax machine, because she had already forgotten (we had shown her, several times already).
Me: “This icon shows you to place the document you want to fax face down”
Coworker: “Is that what is means? I thought that was showing me I need to fold the corner over.”
Later, during her last week, on sticky pad pieces of paper, she wrote instructions on how to use the fax machine, including what that icon means, “because the next person you hire might be as confused as me.”
The what is that? Is it dead? A conversation heard between two of my coworkers:
Coworker 1: “What is that?”
Coworker 2: “Excuse me, this?” He holds up the turtle in his hand.
Coworker 1: “Yeah, what is that?”
Coworker 2: “It’s my turtle. It is a box–“
Coworker 1: “Is it dead?”
Coworker 2: “Is it what? Um no…”
We’ve met before: We had a new coworker join the ranks. She lived in the same area as I lived at that time. So do a lot of people. I tend to get a lot of “You look like” from random people. I have one of those faces. So, I am use to it and ready to say, “yes, I know, I get that a lot.” However, this time…
Coworker: “You look familiar. I feel that we have met before.”
Me: “I do not think so, you might think I look like Gillian Ander–“
Coworker: “No that’s not it. I know. We use to work together.”
Me: “No, pretty sure we have not.”
Coworker: “No, I am sure of it. We use to work together. You were the creative director at [company name], back around 1984.
Me: “Um, I do not think so.”
Coworker: “Yes, we did.”
Me: “Well, then I must have been a prodigy, because I was in fourth grade at the time.”
Coworker: “You’re sure?”
Me: “Um, pretty sure.”